Thursday, December 15, 2016

Why The Silence?

Why the silence?

For the last 5 years I’ve written thoughts and experiences about our family, ministry and life in Kenya. I posted over 700 updates for those who supported our journey. It became therapeutic and a lovely way to record memories. For the last two months, I did not write. I avoided my blog and social media. It took me a while to respond to emails. I didn’t know what to say.

We’ve been stateside for 8 months. We have a few more to go.  When we left Kenya for a much-needed furlough, weariness followed me.  While home in Colorado, it shimmed up as my partner. Confusion joined in. Then Frustration appeared forming an overwhelming trio. For the last 8 weeks, every time I tried to write, these three actively get in the way. On the laptop, Word’s “new blank document” screen became my nemesis. I joined a great writing group to spark motivation but became disappointed by my lagging participation. I simply didn’t know how to communicate without feeling tired.

So. Very. Tired.

With that said, I apologize to those who support us for not keeping you updated.  Please know how sorry I feel, how lost I felt, and how I’m processing long term life in Kenya - the fight for Henry, the threats of security, the management of effective cross-cultural ministry - all while being a wife, a mom, a friend with profoundly limited strength in a extremely foreign setting.  Many of these things are still the reality we navigate from more familiar surroundings. I’m not feeling bad for my self. I certainly detest pity parties. I am recognizing I’ve been emotionally injured and the ever-healing wound sometimes seeps, especially when ignored.

As God nurture’s His “unforced rhythms of grace” within my heart, I’ve found my voice again but it may sound a bit different. Probably less-filtered.  I’m searching for my humor though... Might wanna end me a joke to flesh it out...

Thanks for understanding.


Prayer desires:
  • Obviously, for me ~lisa.
  • The kids continued healthy transitions to life in USA.
  • Henry’s medical needs to be addressed effectively - a consensus on the best course of action. Also, that immigration issues solve without uncomplicated delay.
  • Mark’s bio-sand water filter training.
  • The ministry in Kisumu – may fruit remain and multiply.
Praise explosions:
  • Henry is doing so well acclimating to school (even though he did pull the fire alarm yesterday).
  • His Special Needs Resource Team is AWESOME! (Which includes my super sis!)
  • Taleah doesn’t experience anxiety attacks anymore. She really enjoys school, friends and singing in the traveling choir. She plans to attend One Thing at IHOP.
  • Tavin’s maintaining his job, car and gym membership. He’s also songwriting, studying for the ACT and is a huge help around the house.
  • The Resource Center’s amazing ministry to moms and children in Kisumu.