Why the
silence?
For the
last 5 years I’ve written thoughts and experiences about our family, ministry
and life in Kenya. I posted over 700 updates for those who supported our
journey. It became therapeutic and a lovely way to record memories. For the
last two months, I did not write. I avoided my blog and social media. It took me a while to respond to emails. I
didn’t know what to say.
We’ve been stateside for 8 months. We have a
few more to go. When we left Kenya for a
much-needed furlough, weariness followed me.
While home in Colorado, it shimmed up as my partner. Confusion joined in. Then Frustration appeared forming
an overwhelming trio. For the last 8 weeks, every time I tried to write, these
three actively get in the way. On the
laptop, Word’s “new blank document” screen became my nemesis. I joined a great
writing group to spark motivation but became disappointed by my lagging
participation. I simply didn’t know how to communicate without feeling tired.
So. Very. Tired.
With that
said, I apologize to those who support us for not keeping you updated. Please know how sorry I feel, how lost I felt,
and how I’m processing long term life in Kenya - the fight for Henry, the
threats of security, the management of effective cross-cultural ministry - all
while being a wife, a mom, a friend with profoundly limited strength in a
extremely foreign setting. Many of these
things are still the reality we navigate from more familiar surroundings. I’m not feeling bad for my self. I certainly
detest pity parties. I am recognizing I’ve been emotionally injured and the
ever-healing wound sometimes seeps, especially when ignored.
As God
nurture’s His “unforced rhythms of grace” within my heart, I’ve found my voice
again but it may sound a bit different. Probably less-filtered. I’m searching
for my humor though... Might wanna end me a joke to flesh it out...
Thanks for
understanding.
~lisa
Prayer desires:
- Obviously, for me ~lisa.
- The kids continued healthy transitions to life in USA.
- Henry’s medical needs to be addressed effectively - a consensus on the best course of action. Also, that immigration issues solve without uncomplicated delay.
- Mark’s bio-sand water filter training.
- The ministry in Kisumu – may fruit remain and multiply.
Praise explosions:
- Henry is doing so well acclimating to school (even though he did pull the fire alarm yesterday).
- His Special Needs Resource Team is AWESOME! (Which includes my super sis!)
- Taleah doesn’t experience anxiety attacks anymore. She really enjoys school, friends and singing in the traveling choir. She plans to attend One Thing at IHOP.
- Tavin’s maintaining his job, car and gym membership. He’s also songwriting, studying for the ACT and is a huge help around the house.
- The Resource Center’s amazing ministry to moms and children in Kisumu.
Well, I'd be surprised if you weren't tired. Remember, sweetie, even Jesus took off and hid from everyone once in a while. Just think: on your worst day, you are still my best encouragement.
ReplyDeleteDear Lisa, this you know, rest is the answer for the tired body, soul and spirit in the midst of "all while being a wife, a mom, a friend with profoundly limited strength in a extremely foreign setting. Many of these things are still the reality we navigate from more familiar surroundings." My heart goes out to you. I think of all you are navigating, I ask the Holy Spirit to kiss your heart and mind. XXOO
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